The Single Most Important Question We Usually Fail to Ask Ourselves Enough

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The Single Most Important Question We Usually Fail to Ask Ourselves Enough


What do I want?

So simple, so sweet, so full of… je ne sais quois.

You should see peoples faces when I ask that question, it’s like I just deposited something sweet yet new on their tongues. Their head tilts back and to the side, a small, almost happy smile appears, and then I watch as their faces settle into a “hmmmmm” expression and they look for places long forgotten inside their heads. What indeed?



Why do we wait so long to ask ourselves this? I’m sure you have at some point, but why such a long time since the LAST time? Why are we always shelving ourselves, day in and day out?

Are you too busy? For yourself? Really? Who’s winning in this situation, if you’re too busy to see if you’re sincerely happy? What if all that time of not asking sneaks up on you, making you wonder when was the last time you were REALLY happy?

Being able to answer this question is the first step to having everything you want, because until you can answer that, you’re existing without living.

What do I want?

Take a second, right now. I mean, you might as well, you were already just fooling around with time anyway (thanks for spending it here by the way, seriously)

Sit back, take a deep breath, let your eyes settle on that thing they look at when you let yourself wait for the next thought.

What do I want?

Ask yourself that. Then wait.

What do I want?

Give it a moment, relax a bit. It’s okay if you’re not reading right now, it’s okay if you’re not DOING something for like, ten seconds. Wait.

What do I want?

Wait. And listen.


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Chantal Heide – Canada’s Dating Coach

Chantal Heide is an Author and Motivational Speaker, focusing on dating and relationship building. Her books Dating 101, Comeback Queen, Fake Love Need Not Apply, No More Assholes, After The First Kiss, Fix That Shit, Say Yes To Goodness, and Custom Made (available on this website, Amazon, and your favorite online book retailer) help her readers attract the love they’re looking for, regardless of their starting point . View her BOOKS page for more information. Be sure to check out more free advice on Facebook, YouTube, and Itunes, as well as fun tidbits about her life on Instagram and Twitter.

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